Self-preservation is
Seeing someone special online
And stopping yourself from saying 'Hi'.

Twice.

Something I saw on the way to work this morning ---
Soho Square covered in a delicate layer of white.

Phoebe's ain't feeling great,
Cos Sarah wants to stay as friends.
Keep away from people who ain't sure what they want,
That's what we advised.
And her retail therapy session at Zara,
Ended up seeming like mine.
Mom's going to get a new scent when I get back.

Nicole popped me an email from Cambodia,
After a hard time trying to get internet & electricity.
Just honoured and very glad,
That I'm one of the few of the 'friends' list. :]

Working extra hard for Alex & Milano.
Interesting project & a great leader,
That's all it takes to get me going,
In spite of little sleep & food.

How often does good stuff come along anyway?
And even if it does come along often enough,
Doesn't mean we should take it for granted yeah.

Everything's off to Milano this evening,
People, drawings & model,
So tomorrow will be easier.
Funny how fatigue sinks in,
When the adrenaline stops flowing.

Saw bits of snow on the cars this morning.
Played in a light snow shower in late afternoon.
Yeah, first time I'm seeing the white stuff.
But I already started loving it long before,
This very day I've been waiting for.

Let it snow
Let it snow
Let it snow

What would you do,
If a rather attractive girl comes near you,
And she is topless?
I kept my eyes on my bag.
What happens then,
If this girl starts talking to you?
I told myself to look at her eyes.
And that I did.

*twitches*

Valentine's Day 2002.
Was watching Miss Congeniality with An & LM at Suntec.
That was within a week of my first break-up.
The then-ex called in the middle of the show,
Hence I dashed out of the theatre.
The rest is history.
The point was that for that reason,
I've always only knew half of that movie.
Watched it off some old avi file today.
Man, I actually left despite Sandra Bullock!
She's such a charmer.

Today's capoeira class plus Hollywood movie,
Confirmed my interests in kick-ass girl & ladies.

1
Called Singapore to wish relatives happy new year.
Godma/Aunt said,
We're having a feast here,
While you're so poor thing there,
Got nothing to eat.
Wah liew, thanks hor.
That was called rubbing salt to the wound.
By my very own Godma.

2
Met Chelle for flat viewing sessions today.
First was at Abbey Street near London Bridge.
Well-decorated new council flat,
To share with an Aussie lady.
But total rent with bills ended up too much for me.
Inconvenient transport was also undesirable.

Was going to the Denmark Hill flat,
When we passed by an spiritual shop,
Near a street called Love Walk.
Shop sold all sorts of items,
From astrology to well-being.
Bought coffee to chill out at the basement.
Pleasant surprise.
Basement lounge had low coffee tables,
With candle lights & soft sitting mats.
Super chill-out.

Was late by the time we reached Denmark Road.
No one answered the door.
Decided to drop this choice,
As the area didn't look too safe.

No new accomodation,
But all is not wasted,
As we had a good time hanging out,
And getting to know each other a little more.

3
Went back to work for 2 hours,
Then proceeded to Canary Wharf.
Chelvin, Jia, Ming & Teck.
Headed to Karen & Kathy's,
For the Chinese New Year party.
Lovely chinese food ---
Seafood you tiao, crispy duck in popiah skin, curry chicken...
If we have this often enough,
Maybe I wouldn't think of Singapore.

Ming & I did retarded things on the Jubilee line.
But we had fun. :]

Was in a slightly tipsy mode last night,
So I rang someone in Singapore.

Me: Heya.
She: Hey!! Are you calling from London??
Me: Yeap. Whacha doin'?
She: Oh, I'm having lunch... why you call??
Me: Hmm, just came home & decided to call random people.
She: I gotta go, you go call other random people ok??
Me: Urm. Ok.
She: Bye!

I lied.
It wasn't random at all.

Thursday lunch was tim sum with colleagues.
Lots of wonderful food.
Slurp.

Midori showed us her engagement ring,
That she designed herself.
Beautifully crafted.

Architect Alex is very nice,
Plus she reminds me of Nicole,
Therefore I decided to give it my all,
To work for her on this tough pitch/project,
Against all the big names.
FOA, Foster, Zaha Hadid.
Take my life.

UCL party plus Popstarz.
A very enjoyable night out.
Met Will, Nick, Tae, Jeff, etc.
Very happy for Phoebe & Sarah,
Who found their desired partners today.
Lesson I taught ---
Never leave your feelings unsaid.
Yeah right.
One sweet day.

Spoke to this girl the other day.
Somehow the scene replayed in my head today.

Me: Oh, here's the URL for the photos we took that day.
She: Ok! Thanks!!
Me: Does the link work?
She: Yarrrhh!!! Thanks!! So weird!!! So many pictures of me!!

*Freezes & slaps forehead*

Love, Actually.

I woke up this morning,
To the same shades of gray.
An old dream was haunting me.

Absence of news from Nicole for nearly a month,
Further dampened the moods.
I took an alternative route to work,
Hoping to change my perspectives of the mundane.

Day 1 of another new project group,
Working on a Milano site under Alexandra.
She is a cool Italian woman.
I noticed her since my first day at work,
Because she had large eyes that reminded me of Nicole.
Italian large eyes, perhaps.
Didn't help the blues.

Right before leaving the office for reunion dinner,
Did the usual routine of checking mail.
A pleasant surprise awaited me.
Nicole sent me two short emails. :]
That really cheered me up heaps.

Happily met the rest for reunion dinner ---
Jia, Teck, Ming, Ming's sis, Karen, Kathy, Chongho.
Dinner was just an affair of small talks.
Didn't feel that special actually.
Starting to miss Chinese New Year in Singapore.

And on my way home,
I saw a man sitting on the ground and wailing,
Staring at his mobile phone clutched in his hand.

It's been a substantial weekend.

Met JW on Friday after work.
Headed off for a few drinks & catching up,
Before going to the G3 party in Mayfair.
The G3 party wasn't too fantastic,
So we left for Ghetto with her mates Lucy & co.
Queue outside Ghetto was too long,
So JW & I decided to pass & head home.

Back to Fulham area on Saturday,
To visit the old housemates.
Too bad Kim wasn't around.
Headed to Camden with Garazi & Christophe.
Magic mushroom shops sprouted everywhere.

Met Ernie & co. at Sainsbury,
Was introduced to Michelle.
Headed to Jackson's to cook dinner.
The result:
Lemon chicken by Jackson,
Orange ribs by Ivy,
Tomato omelette by Irene,
Fried lettuce by Michelle.
Ernie & I made some French appetiser ---
Grilled tomatoes stuffed mainly with bread crumbs.
After reading that whole list of food,
What else can I say?
Fabulous dinner.

Sunday was a strange day.
Pick out the snippets of facts as I tell the tale.

Capoeira class in the afternoon,
Then a Brazilian music workshop at Hammersmith.
Cati told me during a small talk session,
That she works as a housekeeper for Kate Winslet.
Whoa.

Casto drove us to the Maya's party after the workshop.
Learnt in the car that most of them live in Nottinghill area.
Cati educated me on drugs after we shared a joint.
Casto's neighbour got kicked to death last week.
A girl living in the area commited suicide at the shop her boyfriend worked.

We arrived at Maya's flat at Nottinghill/Westbourne area.
Maya is Danish,
Annd probably the best-looking girl in class.
And her body is great.
I know it cos she is that girl I shook hands with,
When we were in the changing room.
Maya made wonderful food ---
Her own bread, guacamole, cous-cous (with mango bits!), rice, humus...
And she sews her own (nice) clothes.

The next thing I know,
This girl was telling me Maya & her were together.
All I could say was, 'Really?'
Then I found out from her colleagues they work at Amber,
Which is a gay restaurant-bar that I went with JW on Friday.
Then I realised one of her colleagues,
Is the ex-girlfriend of an aquaintance of mine,
Though we haven't met before.

Too much information, perhaps.
All strung together by capoeira classmates.
Feeling very odd.
Hope it isn't the weed.

My welcome gift took me by surprise ---
Arms & legs covered by bites.
The bed bugs are back!
Did a bit of extermination today,1
Killing many bugs of various sizes.
MY hair stood as I crushed them ruthlessly.
And I am now itching all over.

Met Kaz yesterday at G-A-Y,
Then popped over to Candy Bar.
Met a friendly couple, Louise & Lena.
Lena was telling me the benefits of staying at Southbank,
While Louise was trying to promote her colleague to me.
New girl on the block, Louise said.
Uh, yeah, ok.

Dinner with Angela today.
Met her mate Abby & Abby's mate KW.
Had a hilarious dinner session.
Waitress at restaurant said they ran out of roast chicken,
KW said in fluent cantonese,
What type of gai (chicken) do you have?
A sumptous meal.
And now I'm feeling broke.

As the cold air kissed my face,
I remembered what I missed about London.

Woke up on Monday,
To a cute voice I haven't heard in years.
Xiao finally called.
They say that once you've truly loved someone,
You will always love the person in someway or another.
It's true.

Celine drove us to SMU to meet Liang for lunch,
Then bummed around in Liang's office.
It suddenly hit me what goes on behind lecturers' office doors.
Witnessed more bimbotic acts from these babes,
That I will miss dearly when I'm gone.

Met Xiao at cityhall at 4.30pm.
I was a little nervous about meeting her intially,
But I think the worry was uncalled for.
She looks pretty much the same,
Just more womanly than before.
But I still remember the girlish charm she had,
That I was once so attracted by.
Catching up was done every where,
Since there was so much to be done.
We walked around to repair her watches,
Then ended up having soup, wedges & tea in a cafe.
Hope to see her in Europe soon.

Arrived home in time to finish zipping up my bags,
And to call people to say goodbye.
Dad & Mom sent me to the airport.
It wasn't a great goodbye I had with Dad.

Singapore-Osaka flight had no in-flight entertainment,
Likely because it was a midnight flight.
Bah.

Landed in Osaka at around 7.30am local time.
Had a sneak preview of how expensive things are,
While trying to buy some food at the airport.
Slept on the sofa in the waiting lounge for 3 hours,
While waiting for the flight transfer.

JAL serves really wonderful meals.
Each meal comes with 2 appetizers, 1 main, & 2 desserts.
Cold soba, Jap salad, Don, Fruits, Cake/pudding.
What is impressive is the hot plate under the Don container ---
Keeps the rice and stuff warm.
Way to go, Japs!

Arrived at Heathrow at around 5pm GMT,
To face a hellish long queue at the customs,
And a ripped luggage bag that was a free gift from DBS.
Cheap.

Reached the London apartment at around 8pm.
After 20-odd hours around the world.
I'm finally back. :]

Received a Friendster message today,
From the first girl I ever loved.
She left her contact number & email.
Turned out that she is in Singapore.
Rang the number in the morning,
But she was already out.
Left a message for her to call me back.
Despite feeling a sense of urgency,
I had to tell her uncle that is was not urgent,
Simply because I think she would think it isn't.

A timely though unexpected meeting on ICQ,
Brought Minks, YT & I to Macs at Forum,
Where Minks updated us on her exciting life.
One month on the Canary Islands.
That simply rocks.

Temptation lured me to the travel bookshelves in Borders,
Where I flipped through some books to read up on South California.
The more I read about Orange County & Dana Point,
The more I want to go visit Nicole.
The sun, the sea, the sand, the girl.

Bought a management book from Kino,
Headed to Raffles City to meet Bin.
Turned out that Binbin & Edmund were there too.
Edmund drove us to Jalan Kayu for prata.
Bin & I rolled helplessly onto our backs at the back of his van,
As he drove up the ramps and out of the carpark.
Hilarious.

And there is still no news,
From the girl I left a message for.

Travel consultant called early in the morning,
To announce the bad news of no available tickets.
Jumped up to turn on my computer & log on.
After half an hour of fiddling around on Zuji,
I managed to grab a pair of tickets at $1500,
From Singapore to London with a stopover at Osaka,
At early morning of the coming Tuesday.
Rushed down to Shaw Centre to make payments,
And collected my precious tickets at the same time.
Brilliant.

Tim sum lunch at Yum Cha Toa Payoh.
The prawn dishes were unforgettable.
Visited paternal relatives with Dad.
Struck me that my grandfather died in that very toilet I was using.

Paid Van a visit at her place,
Where I had nice little conversations with everyone.

Went to maternal grandparents' for dinner.
My last homecooked meal this vacation,
By people who watched me grow up.
Gave my cousins in secondary 4 a briefing about JC stuff.

Met Bin & YT at Cityhall area to chill out.
Slow-Mo meets Sloth.
YT & I had to meet May at Holland Village,
So we left Bin at half 11.
May was a tad displeased at missing Shireen at Wala Wala,
But YT & I made up for it by finding her apartment keys in Pittsburg.
Stoned around crapping & viewing photos on May's computer,
Until YT was too tired to even sit around.

Have a good trip May,
You dudettes have made this vacation very special. :]

Two Hainanese babes came over on Thursday night,
And we spent the night yakking away.
Missed out some important bits of MW's life,
Thanks to the Forbidden Fruit drink.

Met Esther, Shok & Uncle at Bugis on Friday afternoon,
And FY later in that evening for dinner & drinks.
Met Tiffy & Carrie (finally!) while at Mad Monks for abit.

Intended to get a bunch of folks to do karaoke,
As Dad had a karaoke room booked at Raffles Town Club.
Ended up as a flop,
The people who could come earlier were too tired;
Ruth, FY & I arrived there to just in time to watch the session end,
While we were still trying to figure out how to use the system.

Starting hopping around places after that thanks to boredom.
Mr Bean at Selegie, Mad Monks, Why Not, Zouk.
Bumped into Suzanne at Monks this time around,
And got psychoed to visit WhyNot with her & her mate.
Met a girl who looked like a shorter version of Van there.

Despite Zouk having a better collection (by numbers),
Like how Arts has more babes than Architecture,
FY's chick-hunting session was as successful as my karaoke plan.

Finally saw my yellow site today.

I feel like a rolling stone.
Life cannot be more exciting than now.
Got my bags 3/4 packed,
Sat at home to wait for the phone calls,
To tell me if there are any last minute tickets.
Went to UE Square under Uncle's instructions,
To request for help from Brunei Airlines.
It didn't work quite as planned.

I was offered an option by the agent.
To fly off to Bangkok tonight,
And wait for a possible ticket while I am there.
Quite tempted by the excitement.
After considering the amount of time I've spent at home,
I decided against it.
Extended my leave application,
And I should be staying here till Sunday.
Gives me time to visit Grandparents on Saturday.
Great.

Imagine you have a friend,
Whom you know treasures sleep above all things,
Who woke up in the middle of her beauty sleep at night,
Just to ring you up to say goodbye & take care,
How would you feel?

Thanks for being so sweet, YT. :]

Had lunch at Newton Food Centre,
With Ruth, Jeanie & Jem.
Clams, BBQ stingray, fried hokkien mee, char kway teow, po piah...
Life is great with good friends & good food.
Jeanie's really nice,
And I'm glad Jem & her could talk to each other,
At times that Ruth & I were caught up with our own conversations.

Ruth & Jeanie left to catch a movie,
So Jem & I headed to Dhoby Ghaut to meet Danny for beer.
The couple left to watch RoTK,
So I sat around to finish up the jug.
Felt super sleepy & stoned out after that.

Walked from Plaza Singapura to Borders,
Stopping by TopMan along the way.
Tried to visit the blog at TopMan,
And it wouldn't work either.
The inability to see my blogsite is pissing me off.
Ended up looking at pictures of KK to cheer myself up.
Took a nap at a corner of Borders,
Till it was time for my dinner appointment.

Liam looked really tired when I met her,
Likely from school and site study.
I probably looked no better.
Dinner was at Pasta Fresca.
Alfredo Penne & Carbonara Spagetti.
Very creamy & rich.
Took some mad pictures.
My favourite picture is a picture she took,
Where my facial features looked like 3 horizontal strokes.

Came home early to pack,
Even though I still haven't got a ticket to leave.

Lunched with May & YT at Tekka Market.
Had oyster omelette and kway chup.
YT brought us to K2LD for a little tour,
Which came with a bonus tour of Cream.
Trimmed my hair at Toni&Guy,
Then visited Bin & Tiffany at their workplace,
And sat there till Lips came along to meet for dinner.
Had dinner at this '4-faced Buddha' hawker centre,
Where I bumped into LG-Dawn.
Lips & I met Mags for a little sit & yak session.
Too bad Mags had to leave earlier.
Met Bin & Tiffany & their new colleague after Lips left.

Tiffany asked if that girl with me that day was my girlfriend.
Strangely, Celine's bro also asked that same question.
We were totally well-behaved!
But like I said to someone:
Impossible as it may be,
If that girl ever becomes my girl,
Then I'll never set my eyes on anyone else again. :P

Reality is that I am having problems with my air tickets.
And I'm dying to leave before I fall.

Typing without seeing how it turns out,
That is what blogging is about now.
Which also means I can't see any suds.
Don't know what is wrong with the internet.

Sunday.
Fabulous Japanese lunch session with relatives.
Painted half a poster on the storeroom door,
Since someone said retro-punk is the way to go.
Had another chilling out session at night,
At Holland Village with Ruth & FY.

Went down to NUS on Monday,
Met Van, Gaya and Ken for prata lunch.
Paid Mrs Chan a visit to update her on my job,
And to thank her for the letter of recommendation.
Sneaked into the library with Van.
Kinda glad they are finally renovating the library.
And the new orange slice chairs are quite comfortable.
Good move to place them along the windows.
Bought papaya milkshake.
Suddenly recalled this amusing line,
Lips that touch papaya milkshakes do not touch mine.
LOL.
Visited SM at Temasek Hall.
Random bits of updates and views about things.

Met Bin, Binbin and Gab in town for dinner.
It seems like an annual meeting thing,
Since the last time we did this was a year ago.
As the most hilarious tales were told,
Mad laughters were heard in Sakae Heeren.
Chillout session at Acid Lounge wrapped up the day.

For some unknown reasons,
I am unable to access almost all blogsites.
The past few days have been long but fantastic.

<<
Despite a cancelled lunch appointment on Friday,
Likely due to a supper session that lasted longer than it should,
I managed to meet a whole chunk of folks,
And settle the payment for the air ticket of unknown status.
Met Esther for coffee at Starbucks Raffles City.
Went through some photos & blabbered randomly.
Dinner was at Nasi Padang place at Boat Quay,
With Andrea and Jean the SPL.
Post-dinner chilling at a very deserted Mad Monks.
Made snakies for Jean & myself.
Rushed to Holland Village Starbucks for business meeting.
Joli, Yan, Jason, Lips, An & May.
Planning plus brainstorming for company name.
After-midnight humour induced too much lameness in ideas.
Tan Tan Lim Tay ?!?!?!?!?!
Super hilarious lameness.
Went over to Breko with May, An & An's friend for drinks,
Then to Newton for supper after May left.
Conversations about Christianity, girls, etc.
Indian guy who tried to sell us tissue paper,
Spoke in fluent hokkien, cantonese and chinese.
In the end he gave us free tissue paper.
I still don't know why.
Stoned at the table till 6 am,
With the main entertainment being this spunky girl,
Who was sitting around 3 tables away.
Went home and crashed till 11 am.

Bought Mom's colleagues lunch at a Korean restaurant,
To thank them for setting up a new computer for us.
Met Audrey & Lisa at Starbucks (coffee again!).
Exchanged tales & updated Aud on London.
Bumped into Yan, Jason, Joli & Derrick there.
Business meeting that I walked into.
Got myself updated on the situation,
Headed to Lou's for class reunion with Yan & Jason.
Lou's place was freaking far away at ulu Tanah Merah.
But it was a nice house with a nice garden.
Ruth, Celine, Liang, Louisa, FY, Dorcas, Enrica, Yan & Jason.
Ruth 'formulated' Ice-cream Soda Malibu,
Which tasted like sweet kiddy drinks.
Made a call somewhere in between catching up with friends,
Which is something I know I should not be doing,
But yet I still did.
It surprised me when she said that I sounded sad.
Went back to the safety of the crowd for more drinks,
And played our usual drinking game of 99.
Grabbed a lift from Celine to FY's,
Where I spent the next 6 hours of the night.
Quite a good session I must admit.
I laughed the last few hours away,
And I'm still quite amused.
LOL.

New Year's Day was spent sleeping,
Spending time with Mom,
Chilling out with Yan.
Nice.

Discussion about True Love with a few different people.
One said True Love is Commitment.
I objected ---
Commitment is a by-product of true love.
Posted the question to the Fellowship on New Year's Eve.
And now May's words keep ringing in my head.
True love is wanting the best for the other person,
Even if it means sacrificing yourself.
Something like that.
I absolutely concur.
That was something I truly believe in,
But over the years, that idea got misty.
It is good to be reminded of purity.
Thanks, May. :]

New year resolutions:
Plan the next 5 years of my life,
Full inputs to realising dreams,
And to travel & learn more.

<<
New Year's Eve.
Lunch with Ruth, Liang & Celine at Magic Wok Far East.
I suppose because there is no service charge,
Hence the service sucks although the food was good.
Celine had to leave early,
But the rest of us went to Starbucks for Coffee.
An called at a timely hour,
And joined us at Starbucks at OPH.
Sweet!

Wedding dinner at Sentosa.
Mom's cousin's son got married.
Three tables in a cosy room,
With views to the golf course & sea.
Took some time to get everyone to warm up,
But I believe in the end everyone had a good time.

Godfather dropped me off at May's,
And the Fellowship of the Ring was reunited!
Rings of fats from various different lifestyles. ;]
Crapped over Vodka mixes & ice-cream,
Did an impromptu countdown,
Popped non-alcoholic champagne,
More blabber followed with the vodka flow.
Wicked!

Went to crash at YT's nice apartment,
Only to find the door ledged.
YT rang the phone of her flatmate,
Till the doors were opened by a girl,
Wrapped in a towel & obviously pissed off.
And so I woke up in someone else's house,
On this very first day of the new year.